What Is “Birdnesting” and Is It Right for Me?
By DADvocacy™ | January 28, 2017After a divorce, there are several available custody options for parents, including:
- Sole Custody. This type of custody refers to situations where one parent has sole custody over the children. The non-custodial spouse in these situations is granted visitation rights.
- Joint Custody. This type of custody refers to situations where both parents share custody of the child or children. Children often alternate between living at each parent’s residence.
- Birdnesting. This act refers to a recent trend in custody rights inspired by the TV show, “John and Kate Plus 8.” In birdnesting, both parents keep a marital residence (the “nest”) where the children permanently reside. The parents take turns living at the residence. Sometimes, birdnesting occurs in different apartments located within the same building
Advantages to Birdnesting
The main advantage to birdnesting is that this type of custody arrangement is the least abrasive for the emotional health of children involved in a divorce. In sole and joint custody arrangements, children are constantly shuffled between each parent’s home which causes children to experience feelings of upheaval and disruption. By removing the disruptive quality of most divorces, children engaged in birdnesting scenarios are able to keep schedules, maintain friendships, and continue participation in activities after a divorce without fear of significant disruption. Psychologists report that children in birdnesting scenarios feel comfortable and happy. Children in birdnesting scenarios also feels less stress than children in traditional arrangements because birdnesting children do not experience the difficulty of having to constantly switch back and forth between parental homes.
The Downside to Birdnesting
There are numerous obstacles involved in birdnesting, which might prevent parents from selecting this type of custody. These obstacles include:
- Cost. Birdnesting can be remarkably expensive. The parents might very well have to finance three households: the central home, the location where the mother lives when she is not at the central residence, and the location where the father resides when he is not at the centra residence. These high costs might deter parents who otherwise would agree to a birdnesting scenario.
- Dealing with the Other Parent. Parents who engage in birdnesting must get along with each other because the parents will need to participate in a timeshare arrangement. The parents must be comfortable sharing the same physical space. The parents must also be able to decide issues regarding housekeeping without getting into fights with one another. If there is any amount of friction between the two parents, birdnesting is likely to be a poor choice in deciding how custody will be handled.
- Life Changes. Birdnesting can lead to very complicated scenarios if one of the parents is granted a new job far from the house. Courts often resolve matters in the best interest of the child, which likely means that the court will decide the children are unable to change locations with the parent who takes a new job. Also, birdnesting can prove complicated if one of the parents ends up in a serious relationship with another adult. The parents must then resolve issues like deciding if the new boyfriend or girlfriend is able to stay at the house. If both parents are unlikely to relocate due to jobs or enter into new romantic relationships, however, birdnesting is likely a wise idea.
- What To Do With The House. Birdnesting parents must be able to work out an arrangement detailing what will happen to the house once the birdnesting is complete. The home may be purchased by one of the parents or the house may be sold and the profits split between parents. Moving once birdnesting is complete can also be emotionally difficult for the parents.
If you are facing a divorce and considering a birdnesting scenario, you need the perspective and assistance of a skilled attorney. For further information or to schedule an appointment please contact top Father’s rights attorney in Miami at 305-371-7640 or visit www.DADvocacy.com.